Letting Go of Photography

“You’re a really good photographer! Why did you stop shooting Boudoir? ”
A good friend of ours asked me that yesterday and I had a really hard time framing my answer. I sputtered out, “After trying to convince women of their beauty for 11 years, I just kind of gave up.”


And, since the first answer that comes to mind is usually the real answer, I realized this is my truth. 

I gave up. It lost its lustre and I lost my passion for it.
However, I didn’t give up in the sense that I failed, more that I realized that in a world where 90% of people we see on social media and in print are filtered, what the fuck is point? Women have to have the presence of mind (or find it through life experience) to realize that they are comparing themselves to bullshit. 

I would often do a shoot with a gal, show her the final result, she would oooh and ahhh and say things like, “I can’t believe that’s me!” or, “I feel so beautiful and more confident than I ever have.” But then I would get, “Can you just tuck in my rolls a bit?” or, “ I don’t like the way my ass looks. Can you lift it up a bit?” Uhm, no. If you want your ass lifted, get off it and go to the gym. Boudoir is not supposed to be about digital nipping and tucking, it’s about seeing your body in a new light and learning accept it and love it, even if you are working hard to change it. Then she would start posting photos on IG or FB that were filtered AF and all I could think was, “Do you actually think that people don’t see that you’ve completely changed your appearance? Why are you so terrified of letting people see the real you? Why isn’t the real you good enough?”

Exerting futile effort is never a good feeling.

I know I did make a difference for some of my clients and it is a beautiful thing, but after so many just reverted to that place of insecurity that has existed for so long within them, I eventually just said, “Fuck it!”
I wanted to feel the passion and satisfaction of creativity running through my veins again, so I moved on to the one thing that has never left me feeling disappointed or burnt out—writing. 

I figure if I can’t reach women with photographic proof of their innate beauty, I’ll reach them with my words.

A Reflection Like No Other- Vernon Boudoir Photography

One of the job perks of being a Boudoir Photographer is constantly being given the opportunity to show our clients how their loved ones see them. We don’t see ourselves the way others see us – especially the way our spouses or our children see us. When we look in the mirror, we tend to focus on our flaws while the people who love us see all the little things that make us beautiful to them. If only we could look in the mirror and see ourselves the same way the people we love see us!
This is what Boudoir Photographers do – we use our cameras to become a reflection of the beauty within each of our clients. It is uplifting, fulfilling, heart-exploding work and I can’t imagine how empty my work life would be if I didn’t shoot Boudoir.

Feeling blessed today and looking so forward to the year ahead.

 

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Give me a call at (250) 320-4418 or check out my website at http://www.joleflufy.com and book a session today! The time to shine is now!